Okie doke.

Nov. 30th, 2008 10:23 pm
joegoda: (Default)
[personal profile] joegoda
I went to the Orphan Thanksgiving, and was loved. It's amazing to watch my own mind go from mostly mechanical and objective to participatory and subjective. I didn't join this happy crew those years ago because I wanted to. If you ask Sherry, she pretty much had to guilt me into it for the first few times. I won't deny it. I was, and am still pretty much, not a joiner.

I went to the Thanksgiving tonight feeling pretty darn bad because I absolutely missed my family.

Yeah, I still feel bad, and am hoping that nothing I have passes on to everyone, because every one got a hug or a handshake. But you know... I had to go. I miss being loved. I miss the physical evidence of that love.

With this family, bless 'em all, it's there, folks, it's there. Heck, why am I telling you this? If you can read this, you probably already know.

But here's a thing about me you did know. Up till about 4 years ago, you would not be able to pry me out of my little apartment for love nor money. I was a hermit, tried and true. Yeah, I was lonely. Yeah, I wished I could find a spot to belong, but at the same time, I didn't trust it. Every time I had tried, I had failed. So, I just gave up.

That's why the core of me is still a cynical S.O.B. I don't like most women, and I don't like most men. There's a kajillion reasons for this, none of which I'm going into, cuz it's boring to whine about water under the bridge... specially when the problem was more than likely as much me as anything else.

Lucky me, a few unfortunate circumstances, a couple of wrong turns and I'm where I'm at now. I don't have to go looking for a spot to belong. The spot to belong came looking for me.

How cool is that? Sorry bout the cooties, though.

(no subject)

Date: 2008-12-01 04:52 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rowangolightly.livejournal.com
I think we can all survive a few cooties, my very dear. It just wouldn't have been the same without you!

*HUGS*

(no subject)

Date: 2008-12-01 05:00 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] joegoda.livejournal.com
Thank you, My Queen. I truly feel to be a cog in the machine. A chick in the roost. And a beat of the heart. You folks, you family... I cry to think of being without you. YOU are a wonder and a love to me, and I shall always remain,

Yours.
(deleted comment)

(no subject)

Date: 2008-12-01 05:01 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] joegoda.livejournal.com
So am I, Bob, my brother. So am I.

(no subject)

Date: 2008-12-01 05:16 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] capi.livejournal.com
*happy sigh*

I'll sleep better tonight.

(no subject)

Date: 2008-12-01 05:27 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] joegoda.livejournal.com
Were you planning on sleeping badly? *hugs* I'm still kinda icky, sis. Just figured I wouldn't let it get me down.

(no subject)

Date: 2008-12-02 04:44 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] capi.livejournal.com
I just haven't been getting good solid sleeps, is what.

Been having to use pharmaceuticals EVERY danged night. *feh* But knowing you is doing betterer? That helps put my mind at rest. Every lil' thing like that is a huge help. ((HUG))

(no subject)

Date: 2008-12-02 06:34 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] joegoda.livejournal.com
I do seem to be better, capi dear. My left ear is still pretty blocked, and sinuses are just NOT happy. Still have a small fever, but it's burning out. I been using my pharmaceuticals every night too, just to get to sleep. I don' like medicines, but I'm a using 'em now...

(no subject)

Date: 2008-12-01 05:55 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] apocalypticbob.livejournal.com
It wouldn't have been the same without you, Mr. Neutral Good.

Love you.

(no subject)

Date: 2008-12-01 06:00 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] joegoda.livejournal.com
I feel the same about you, Miss Chaotic Good. Hmmm... if only the name Khaotica wasn't taken. Sounds kind of Egyptian. I better stop, cuz my brain is going all sorts of places, playing with the possibilities of it all.

(no subject)

Date: 2008-12-01 03:59 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] rowangolightly.livejournal.com
*chuckle* ....and together we three make "one Good!"

Ms. Lawful Good

(no subject)

Date: 2008-12-01 05:09 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] joegoda.livejournal.com
It's the truth, yes it is.

(no subject)

Date: 2008-12-01 01:26 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] ladyniniane.livejournal.com
Love you! I was very glad to see you come up to the front door last night!

(no subject)

Date: 2008-12-01 03:52 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] joegoda.livejournal.com
Love you back! I was very glad, also, to see you in the window!

(no subject)

Date: 2008-12-01 03:21 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] okgirlnextdoor.livejournal.com
"Lucky me, a few unfortunate circumstances, a couple of wrong turns and I'm where I'm at now. I don't have to go looking for a spot to belong. The spot to belong came looking for me."

I don't know about anyone else, but I can honestly say that applies here too. It was so good to see you there.

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