Nano Day 19 - Working Title: Cantata

[joegoda]

I'm a-strugglin...


Landing at the Trieste Airport was practically quaint and quiet, compared with the layover they experienced in the Malpensa airport in Milan. There was so much new construction and the airport personnel were so rude that they were glad to be on the small charter plane flying into Trieste.

"Damn it!" Wells said, "Leave it to Milan to turn a thirteen hour flight into a fifteen hour flight."

"Now, dear," Laura calmed, "At least I called ahead to let Kaylee know we were going to be delayed."

"We wouldn't have been so delayed if they had just believed that I had no luggage," Wells grumped. "If I had too much, they would have spent the entire time searching through it, I'm sure. Because I didn't have any, they decided that I must have been some sort of terrorist." He kicked at a rock outside the passenger pick up. "It's a good thing that Nick Charles is not a registered offender anywhere."

"All right, Mister Grump. It's over and we're here." She craned her neck, looking for her daughter. "If you see a black Fiat Croma, let me know," she said.

"I wouldn't know a Fiat Croma from a flat corona," Wells replied.

"Never mind, here she comes." Laura waved wildly as a small black car pulled up.

The driver's side rolled down, and a face framed with dark brown hair said in Italian "Mamma! It's so good to see you! I thought you had gotten lost in America."

In English, Laura said "Kaylee!" She leaned into the window and kissed both her daughter's cheeks. "Let's speak English, out of courtesy for my guest, please? This is Herbert Wells, a consultant from America."

"Very nice to meet you, Mister Charles." Kaylee's voice was soft and pleasant, a younger version of Laura's. The face was also obviously of Laura's blood, though Wells could see a bit of himself around the eyes and in the fuller bottom lip. "Now," Kaylee continued, "are you going to get into the automobile, or shall you run along outside?"

"Ragazza sciocca," Laura said, smiling. Wells opened the back door and she slid in. Laura turned to him and whispered, "I think it would be better if we spoke English. Most of the people here don't, and it would allow us a bit of privacy." Wells nodded.

"What are you whispering about, mama?" Kaylee asked, looking in the rear view mirror.

"We are talking about you, daughter. About how concerned you are for your poor mama's aching bones from having flown for fifteen straight hours. About how you are hurrying home to make sure I can soak in a hot tub and get the soreness out before I turn into a giant bruise." She waved her hand in two quick flips, indicating that Kaylee should drive. "Andare! Andare!"

Kaylee laughed and said, "Approvazione! Vado, vado!" She expertly shifted the gears and drove out to street that led to Motorway A4. She turned right at a sign that read 'A4-Torino-Tristie'. Kaylee looked into the mirror, directly at Wells. "Next stop, Opicina!"

Kaylee talked while she drove, asking a hundred questions of her mother, interspersed with the flavor of soft Italian spoken in her velvet voice.

"How was the food?"

"It was fine, Kaylee," Laura said. "Not as good as here, but it was fine."

"Did you stay in a hotel?" A very pointed question, Kaylee's eyes were fixed on her mother.

"Of course I did, curioso." Laura's eyes hooded and a smile crept in.

"Alone?"

"I think you should watch the road," Laura said, pointed at the oncoming traffic.

Kaylee quickly jerked the wheel and the Fiat lurched, throwing Laura and Wells together.

"Senza riguardo," Kaylee said, and then in English, "Regardless, it matters not." Smiling in the mirror, she continued, "It is none of my business." She drove the next few moments in silence and then commented, "Guardo una coppia attraente."

Laura blushed. Wells looked out the opposite window, smiling. His fingers wrapped around Laura's and he said, "Capisco alcuni." He looked at Kaylee in the mirror, whose turn it was to blush. He lifted his thumb and forefinger to show a small space between them and said, "I understand just a little, not much."

The ride went swift and quiet, as no one spoke for a number of miles. Motorway A4 continued through the Italian countryside, and Wells spent his time holding Laura's hand and relishing memories of a view that had not changed much in twenty-five years. Passing by the town of Sistiana, Motorway A4 turned into R.A. Sistiana-Opicina.

"Your name is... Nick?" Kaylee asked. Wells nodded. Kaylee raised an eyebrow and said, "You do not look much like a Nick, Mister Charles."

"Kaylee!" Laura said. "That is very rude."

"Oh, it's all right, Laura," Wells brushed it away. "She probably wants to see what the man who spent fifteen hours on a flight with her mother is like. Who I am, things like that."

Kaylee raised a single, slim hand, her index finger extended. "Esattamente! Yes! That is exactly what I am wanting to see."

Wells continued, "She wants to know if my intentions are honorable... um... onorevole"

"Yes!" Kaylee asked. "Perdono... Pardon my for being so... umm... dirigere... umm."

"Direct." Laura translated.

"Yes, thanks, mama," Kaylee said, "Direct. Yes, Mister Charles. My English is rusty, a little." More slowly, she continued. "My mother changed her plans at a moment, and spent a large amount to flew... fly somewhere, she wouldn't say. To meet you, now I see. Then she changed her plans again, to stay another night, also presumably with you." She looked in the mirror at Wells, her eyes questioning.

He nodded, giving her the answer that would have been foolish to ignore. Besides, he didn't want to. He was interested in seeing what his daughter was like, so he nodded for her to go ahead, keeping his face impassive.

"Very good," Kaylee said, focusing on her driving as she slowed to pay toll at an exit that read 'Gabrovizza San Primo'. A few miles further and she turned right on the exit that read 'Prosecco - Contovello'. "If you continue on the motorway, you reach Trieste. Of course, you will pay toll many times as well. That is how we keep our roads in such excellent shape."

After they had passed the town of Contovello, Wells saw a large sign that read 'Opicina'. Kaylee looked briefly in the mirror and smiled. "Not so far, eh?" She turned right on SS58. Kaylee continued, "So, mama. We know he is at least an honest man, si?"

Laura, not looking terribly happy with her daughter, said, "Kaylee, could you stop the questions? I want to get to the villa and just relax. It has been a very long day."

"All right." Kaylee said, her lips held tight, though it was plainly on her face that the testing questions had just begun. The ride continued in silence.

Wells gently placed a hand on Laura's arm. Quietly he said, "You know... she reminds me a lot of you." To Kaylee he said, "You have a lot of questions, Kaylee, I'm sure. Let me see if I can answer the most burning questions you have, and save you and your mother a very long talk later." He turned to Laura and gently added, "If it's all right with you."

Laura thought and then nodded. "If you think you can do it without causing this headache to become worse, then yes, otherwise, I'd be happier with silence."

Wells winked, "I'll be as gentle as I can, I promise." He scootched up in his seat and quietly, to Kaylee he said, "Your mother and I have known each other for a very long time, from before you were born. We parted as friends and we had not seen each other in years. I'm involved in a company that is interested in starting the same sort of foundation you have here."

Seeing Kaylee's eyebrows rise, he quickly said, "I am a consultant, of sorts. This is a fact-gathering mission. We were looking for a foundation to study and for a non-profit organization, yours is very successful."

Kaylee paused for traffic to clear and then turned right onto a road marked 'Str. Statale'. "What is the name of this... company?" Seeing her mother's face, she shrugged apologetically. She turned left at Campo Romano, drove down a twisting road, and turned right again.

"It's called Quartermain and Associates, Kaylee," Wells replied. "It's not terribly large and hasn't quite made the International Register yet, but we're hoping." He smiled what he hoped was disarming and believable.

A short distance from the corner, she pulled into a long drive, which led to a modest house, low and squat, in the baroque style that was very common to the area. The grounds were expertly trimmed, and the trees simple and green. There were flowerbeds to either side of the house. Kaylee pulled up to the front door and said. "Well. Here we are."

She got out of the Fiat and opened the door to help her mother. As the two of them led the way up the short walk to the front door, Wells stood and stretched his back. Laura turned from the door and asked, "Are you coming?"

"Actually, Laura," Wells answered, "I was hoping that Kaylee could give me a tour of the grounds."

Laura looked surprised. "Don't you want to freshen up? Get some rest? Eat something?"

"In a bit, dear." He looked at Kaylee. "She still has questions to ask, and so do I." To Laura he said, "I figure we might as well clear the air now, as adults, rather than have the air clouded with misconceptions."

Laura looked at him, hard. She couldn't see what he was planning, as he stood there smiling. She looked at Kaylee, who was wearing an expression of wary curiosity. Laura shrugged. "I think you are both matto - crazy." She unlocked the front door and turned to them. "Well, don't be too long. And if I hear any screaming, don't expect me to come running. I'll be in the bath." She went inside and closed the door behind her.

Kaylee walked gently up to Wells, placed her hands on her hips and smiled at him. She was the same height as he was and he could see his blue eyes in hers. She nodded and said in perfect English, "All right. Tell me who you really are."

Comments

[joegoda.livejournal.com]

The anonymous comment was from me, of course. I simply had not logged on. Please understand that everything you say is taken with the utmost seriousness, and I rely upon you to help me make this story better.

the house is underconstruction. I didn't get a chance to build it, as I was writing with the need to go to bed, and I was just bout way to late. As it is, no writing for me tonight, I'm too tired. Yeah, I know.. excuses, excuses. When you're going for word count, you stick something in, saying 'I'll fix it later'

Kaylee does not trust Wells. She doesn't know him, and only knows that her mother rushed out with not explaination and came back with him. Why? Who is he? What is his relation to her? Yes, it's all very much crap right now, and yes, it's going to get a major re-write, and yes, all your comments are incredibly valuable to me.

It feels very odd to me to hear Wells calling Laura "dear" every other moment.

This I *do* take a bit of exception with. Count 'em. How many times? Every other moment? I believe he did it once. Other than that, he either called her Laura, or he didn't refer to her by any name what so ever. The time he called Laura dear is right before he says he's going to 'clear the air.'

Where else were you refering to?

[capi.livejournal.com]

Ah.... that helps, knowing you were throwing it in for now, looking to go back over it. And tired matters!! It does to ME, anyway!! *grin* You gotta get your 50,000 in, and then we can talk refinement, sure!

I don't blame kaylee for being hard against Wells - she has every right. I wasn't pointing out a flaw, necessarily, but.... she's 24 years old, and having been raised by her mother, she KNOWS manners. She's choosing to ditch them for a moment. The fine line you walk here is how far would she go? This could be played out in any number of ways, and i was not implying that your choice was wrong. I was really only feedbacking on it. *heh*

You did not address the issue of Wells lying to Kaylee right off the bat, tho....

I think he called her dear on the plane, maybe, and possibly earlier. Ok, "every other moment" may be an exaggeration (i was tired, too!! *grin*) but with Wells, if he said it TWICE, it's almost too much, being who he is. It's perfectly fine in private moments, and in cafe's and strolls, but..... i just felt he would be less "dear" than he's turning out. *LOL* When Laura uses it, i hear Susi's voice. *grin*

[joegoda.livejournal.com]

You did not address the issue of Wells lying to Kaylee right off the bat, tho....



Kaylee had received an email telling her that Wells was accompanying her. The email had already set the lie in motion. Wells name is, as far as Kaylee knows, Nick Charles. He is a consultant for a company in the US that wants to examine the workings of the foundation that Kaylee and Laura have set up.

Wells was not lying right off the bat, he was continuing the lie. And as you can tell, Kaylee isn't buying it. What does a person do when the goods they are selling aren't being bought? In this case, which we haven't gotten to yet, you sell the truth, or as much of it as you can risk.

Remember, Kaylee is quite possibly a security risk. The more she knows, the more she can tell. Risking everything. Plus, Laura does not want Kaylee to know about her past as a spy. As far as Kaylee knows, her mama has been the director of the Orphanage and the Foundation forever and ever.

[capi.livejournal.com]

My memory begins to overload, and i begin to make my own errors. *snort* I do not remember anybody sending Kaylee the information, making the lie a continuation. Is that just me, or does that need to be brought out somewhere earlier??

Aye, Kaylee is a security risk. this is a thing i tend to forget, altho' Laura nor Wells ever will forget it!!

Your last sentence here.... no!! The orphanage was Kaylee's idea, Laura told Wells this earlier. So while she may not know what her ma did before that, she surely doesn't think of it as a forever and ever thing. SHE started it. Laura was living off money from her aunt, no apologies. No reason why Kaylee should question her mother's past.

I'm just flowing here; dont take any of this as critique. If you find bits that need fixin' cuz i'm talking, cool. If not, cool!

((((( g'morning HUGS )))))

[(Anonymous)]

Morning ))Hugs(( back, Whetstone! Good point, specially bout the last one. Granted, no where in the story so far has kaylee brought up laura's past. At this point, I don't see a reason for her too.

At the airport, it was referred in a reply from Sarah that Kaylee was expecting them, but that was eons ago.

Doesn't matter if it's critique or not, darlin' If a points valid, it's valid. Only a fool would argue against a valid point. (Lawyers and politicians, of course)

[capi.livejournal.com]

Nit-pick alert!!

I remember that Kaylee was sent a communication.... but if there was something in there about this "mission" as Wells put it, you can't assume we'll attribute his apparent lie now to that communication unless you make sure we know what was in it back when it was sent. So we can see very clearly that he is picking up an old thread, not spinning a new one right now.

[joegoda.livejournal.com]

Nits recognized. Why sure, that would make sense. Course, it was hard for me to see what was going to happen in the future before the story told itself to me, but that's an excuse for poor planning, not a reason at all.

What I like about this story is that it is certainly a learning experience. What I don't like so much is that it is certainly a learning experience.

Course, that just means I'll build the NEXT one a bit more carefully!

[joegoda.livejournal.com]

Also... in Italy they view honesty above manners, and tend to get to the point fairly quickly. Kaylee is the product of her raising, to be sure, and Laura is also one to not 'beat around the bush'.

As for Wells lying, it's a lie that she was already told, he was merely supporting it. Course, he agrees with you, which is why he's going to be pretty much completely honest in the next section.

This section is a 'Get from here to there' section, and yes, will probably bear just a little resemblance to the final version.

You can bet your boots, if you wear any, that I'll be sending the revisions to you through email to check out. Why waste LJ bandwidth?

[capi.livejournal.com]

Well.... i like lj bandwidth! *L*

I think you're right about the italian way of things.

Gotta be very frank here (for a capi); i'm not so hot with revision proofing. My brain tries to skim, since it's seen the stuff before. I have to brutalize my way thru. I've *done* it, but it's more like work than this first-time stuff.

*grin* I'm not backing out. Just letting you know; cuz i'm more likely to miss stuff the second time around.

[joegoda.livejournal.com]

Then let's pretend the revision will be perfect! Why not? It's not like it's going to be published or anything, and if it is, I assure the the editors will most assuredly tear it apart.