joegoda: (Default)
2017-07-15 10:59 pm

Mamma said...

Oh, I don't know. I mean, everybody has those days. Today just seemed like one of them. I mean, I woke Shannon up because I have sleep pain, which means I have pain when I sleep and then I moan or groan and stretch to make those pains ease up. So, I woke her up an hour before she had to go to class.

Then, I decided to have a small Jameson's, like you do, in the afternoon. Somehow or other it kicked my ass and I fell asleep in my chair for an hour. That may not sound so bad, but I think I went to sleep in the middle of Shannon complaining to me about some action or other that I did that up set her.

What did I do that upset her? I used the work probably, as in 'there is probably corn and peaches in those sacks'. Now, I knew that the sacks contained corn and peaches. I bought them today. However, I was under the influence at the time my mouth engaged and I was overcome with the Schrodinger function. In other words, I could not see in side the sacks, so they might have contained corn and peaches, or they might not have. Probably they did, because I tend to not believe in the complete mutability of the universes. But they might not, because, you know, irony.

I picked up the sacks and carried them to the kitchen, more to prove to myself that the universe was still solid than anything else. Then, apologizing profusely, as a husband does, I sat in my chair in my office.

So when she started her rant about the use of the word 'probably', I replied, as any good drunken physicist would, 'Obviously, you don't deal with a mutable universe on a daily level', and feel promptly asleep.

I don't know what Shannon thought. She probably kept talking up to the point where I snored. I don't know why women feel they need to use so many words. I got her point before I carried the sacks into the kitchen. that's why I apologized to her. So she would quit talking about it.

But no.... I had to hear the whole "I come home from a long day and all I hear is 'probably'..."etc, write your own script.

Sleeping was a bliss. So, I think I'll do it again. On the sofa. So she can sleep the night through.